Humility is making a place for another without losing myself (credit Chris Klein with this definition and starting point). Greater love has no one than this, that the lover lay down his or her life for a friend.
The paradox of Christian faith is that in losing myself I truly become myself. Thus, because of resurrection, I cannot lose myself. What I can lose, however, is the value that I should place in myself.
To think of myself too highly is not humility. To think of myself too lowly is also not humility, for this too is not honest. Saint Paul writes that he considers himself the worst of all sinners. If this is meant as self-abasement, this is not humble. If, however, Paul rather means to say that he considers no one lower than he considers himself--that if he judges no one more harshly than he judges himself--then he has understood that self-love forms the basis of love for others (as Jesus says in the Greatest Commandment).
If I do not consider myself worthy of value, it means little to say that I consider others higher than myself. If I do consider myself worthy of value--as God considers me, then it means much to say that I consider others higher than myself.
In valuing myself, however, I must not become preoccupied with myself. This is the fault of Narcisssus. Rather, in loving myself, I must care for myself--exercising, meditating, resting, writing, etc. In caring for myself by engaging my passions, moreover, I can actually care for others by serving them. This is done both through the value and impact of what I produce and through the sharing of my passion itself.
How does this then relate to humility? First, humility in this light becomes caring for myself appropriately without preoccupation. Taking time for myself and asserting myself--i.e. not losing my place to others--are a part of this care, for losing my place leads me to pity myself and become preoccupied therein.
This care for myself must be balanced through relationships with care for others. This care will take the form of considering others worthy of sharing my passions with and worthy of investing in growing their passions.
This, then, is leadership. In leadership, I care for my own passions and invest in the passions of others. I also provide space for others' passions to be expressed and train others in expressing them.
Humble leadership, then, balances the expression of my own passions with those of others. The best form of this collaboration ignites a new, diverse passion which finds expression as something beautiful and pleasing to God. As a leader, moreover, I value myself but do not think of myself so often. Instead, I value those I am leading even more. This requires a love which emerges only from interaction and vlunerability with those I lead. Part of caring for my leadership, then, is investing in getting to know those that I am leading and spending time with them.
Humility, like leadership or love, is impossible by myself.
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